Remember your vows; adultery is selfish act, not love

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By Steve Greene

Adultery is not about love. It is about selfishness.

A person who commits adultery is basically saying, “I don’t care what God says. I don’t care what it will do to my husband or wife. I don’t care what it will do to my family. I don’t care what it will do to the other person’s family. I don’t care what it will do to their spouse. I want what I want.”

The adulterer is basically saying, “Forget God, his Word, my spouse, my family and everybody else. I’m going to do what I want to do.” That is not love. That is selfishness of the highest order.

God has called us to make a commitment to his high standard when it comes to matters of sexual purity. It is wise to establish boundaries and develop a plan to preserve and protect your marriage in this day of declining morality.

Begin by making your marriage a priority. A healthy marriage is a powerful deterrent to adultery. But healthy marriages don’t just happen. Two people have to work at it.

When you stood before the pastor, the judge or whoever officiated at your wedding, you committed your life to another person in marriage. It was a commitment to an exclusive relationship. You were committing yourself to make them your priority for the rest of your life.

Healthy relationships are built by each person deciding to put the needs of their spouse ahead of their own. It is about selflessness. This kind of relationship is God honoring. It is healthy and beautiful, and it will bring fulfillment.

Healthy marriages don’t just happen. It takes time, energy and commitment to nurture this kind of relationship. You must make sure your marriage is a priority. You cannot be best friends with someone if you don’t spend time with them.

The decision to preserve and protect your marriage is a choice that involves many individual commitments. Among other things, you must guard your thoughts, maintain healthy physical and emotional boundaries and be willing to be honest. No excuses or rationalizations for behaviors that are unacceptable.

We’ll get even more specific about some of the ways a person can get serious about this next time.

In the meantime, I hope you will think about the commitments you made on your wedding day. Have you honored those commitments consistently from that day to this? Do you intend to do so all of the days of your life? I hope so. It is so worth it. It is the right thing to do.

You may read Steve Greene’s blog at pastorgreene.wordpress.com or you can email him at [email protected].

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